Damn

I looked at her page again... I didn't want to, but I did.

Damn.

I have more important things to worry about than that user of people.

Sorry, Father Gallagher. I'll keep praying for you. I hope more and more people take up your cause. If anyone deserves to stay in this country, it's you Father.

Some people have real problems... I don't.

Righteous Outrage in Kingsbury County!

I'm not one to take up many causes... there's things I believe in, but at the same time I feel others more suited and able to the task can take up those mantles.

However, this is different. It is a situation that has me OUTRAGED!

I have had the privelege of meeting Father Cathal Gallagher on several occasions. While he hasn't said a whole lot to me, per se, I have been incredibly impressed by his gentleness, his good humor, and his willingness not only to be a spritual leader to his parishoners, but to EVERYONE, regardless of denomination or religion.

Earlier this week, I found out that this humble Man of God is being kicked out of the place he has known as home for almost 10 years. Because of a bureaucratic SNAFU, this man, who's citizenship application was approved by the United States Government TWO YEARS AGO, now faces a July 1st Deportation back to his native Ireland.

In a country where the media "talking heads" and the politcal "talking heads" dicker around with how to deal with the tens of millions of people here ILLEGALLY, it is OUTRAGEOUS that this humble man who has followed the rules now has to face this nightmare!

Fortunately, the parishoners of Kingsbury County, as well as the people of South Dakota are not taking this lying down.

For starters, two of South Dakota's Congressional Delegation is looking into this matter. While that's a good start, the good folks of De Smet, Arlington, and Iroquois are doing more.

HelpFather.com has been established to let people around the world know about this injustice going on in South Dakota. In addition to providing links for the Congressional delegation and State officials, people have been leaving their comments, stories, and prayers in support of this Lamb of God...

We love Fr. G and pray that he will be staying here in the USA where he belongs.

He is a huge part of our community and please do not take a part of our community away.

Words cannot describe the love that I feel for this wonderful man. Not only has he been an inspiration to his three parishes, but to countless communities across the region.

Fr. Gallagher made you WANT to be at church. His stories during his homily are inspiring and thoughful.

I could go on and on... but the most poignant was from my brother, Mike...

When my grandmother was layin in the hospital during her final hours, she wasnt awake and wouldnt respond to no one. But when father walked in the room, began to speak, she opened her eyes for i belive the last time. a man that can impact someone w/ that much faith as my grandmother had, imagine what hes doin to the families he sees every weekend.

I damn near choked up when I saw that! Is it any small wonder I love my family?

Go to HelpFather.com. Sign the petition. Contact your lawmakers. Pray. Let's not let this great injustice occur without one hell of a fight!

New week... new beginnings

I know, it's Tuesday. But yesterday was a holiday so the official start of the week is today. Don't like it? Tough! LOL

Workout went well today. Pushed myself on the incline portion of my workout on the treadmill... went on a 4.5% incline instead of my regular 4. That, and the faster pace in which I'm walking really gets the sweat rolling and the heartbeat racing. Of course, a very attractive young woman was running on the treadmill next to me, so that probably added to my increased heart rate as well! Only problem, the way she was running, she'd have no problem running away from this love-sick radio announcer! LOL

I decided I need a new car. Not next summer, like I had planned... Now. Considering I just spent $460 last week on repairs on my car. Wayne, my handy-dandy mechanic dude at Jack's Service, said my car was, and I quote, "A mess". He also said if I'm looking for another car, now would be a good time. So instead of buying the bike I wanted, I think my stimulus check (all $600 of it) is going towards a down payment on a car.

I saw a 1999 Chevy Malibu in Hartford that has 87000 miles on it and a 4-banger for an engine. I checked the fuel efficiency and it rates at 30 on the highway--sweet! And they want 5100 for it. So this weekend, I'm going to take a look at that, as well as some other vehicles.

Asides from that, helped Mom move to her new place in Trent yesterday. Only problem was we didn't have enough straps for the trailer so we ended up taking only half the stuff we wanted to grab. But that's okay. We put a pretty big dent in the amount of stuff, and as soon as Mike and Katy can close on their house, the happier everyone will be.

That's about it for now... I'm sweaty and I smell like a gym sock. Time to hit the showers and head for work!

The Master Manipulator... or so she seems.

I know, I know... I'm beating a dead horse here, but since I don't want to write Jesse and she doesn't want to write me (and is probably still lurking on this blog), she'll get the message sooner or later.

First of all, I started calling her by her original birth name, Jesse. The beautiful, intelligent creature I knew as Nicci does not exist. Rather a manipulative, conniving, con artist.

Funny thing, I actually got along with one of her other friends. She introduced me to "F" while in Chicago, probably hoping we'd go after each other like two bulls fighting for the same cow. But to her surprise (or was it disappointment?), "F" and I got along quite well.

Yesterday, I was cleaning out some files and decided to tell "F" what happened and that because of his friendship with her, I couldn't talk to him anymore. Imagine my surprise when he told me that she had given him the cold shoulder as well! I guess our aborted gladiatorial showdown kinda rubbed her the wrong way.

I found out that a lot of what I feel about Jesse, "F" feels the same. Such as the fact that she tends to twist around words and feelings so that she can take something that she did wrong to you and make it feel like it was YOUR fault! And now that I've had a night to sleep on it, I realized he makes a LOT of sense.

In the three years I knew Jesse, I have NEVER heard her once show any bit of genuine empathy. When we reconnected after a year and a half, she never once showed her remorse for the pain she cause me and my family. In fact, she made it all out to be MY fault and my family's fault! She never could take accountability for her actions and it was always "someone else's fault".

I think there's a psychological term for that: "Sociopath." But then, claiming to be a therapist, Jesse would have known that already.

In any case, "F" and I both came to the understanding that a woman like that was not needed in either of our lives. "F" is a helluva nice guy and he deserves better. As do I.

As for Jesse? Just a bad mistake.

So far, so good...

Haven't dropped dead of that heart attack yet, Jesse!

Well, instead of going and getting drunk last night or chomping down on a Pizza Hut pizza (my kryptonite), I talked with friends, vented, cried, and otherwise took pleasure in their company, both in person and via the telephone.

Believe it or not, all of them have come to the same conclusion... she's not worth my time, my emotions, or my love. I'm better off without her. My friend Susie, said it best when she asked me if I wanted to spend the rest of my life with someone that 1) Is too stupid to understand when something is said in the heat of the moment and 2)Throws 5th-grade insults at you. The answer is no

I begged, I groveled, I balwed. But in the end she was just too immature and stupid to know what true sorrow is and to discover the grace of forgiveness. Which is fine... She'll end up one of those bitter old women who'll never know the pleasure of unconditional love or family. That's her choice.

But as for giving up my fitness program? Hell no! If anything, I want to get REALLY healthy, show myself off and make Jesse choke on her bile. THAT would be the ultimate payback!

Dad's Day

So Dad doesn't get to a computer much. In fact, about the only way he'll find out about this is if my aunt Chloe, my uncle Bill or I tell him about it.

But my dad, mein pops, the biggest single male influence in my life is now 61 years old today. I consider him a father, a teacher, and a friend.

I've known Dad my whole life (which goes without saying)! It seemed though whenever I was younger, I'd usually get his belt or his hand across my backside when I did something stupid (which happened often!) I remember he had a belt with his name on it that Mom used to use to swat the ol' hindquarters when I was bad. In fact, just hearing the word "Steve" and I immediately put my hands over my butt! LOL

Okay, before I make him out to be a monster (it was humor, people!), Dad has always been there for me. No matter where he is in the country, I know I can bend his ear whenever I have a problem. He may have barely finished high school, but he is the greatest teacher I know. I learned to shave from him, how to drive, how to change the oil (by the way, the nut on the oil pan has to be turned to the LEFT if you want to drain the oil!), but most of all, how to be a good person.

Granted, Dad was (and still is) gone most of the time, as is par for the course with his job. But that's just the thing. Times were tight sometimes and we struggled financially at times, but Dad was always out there, busting his backside 30 hours a day so we could have a roof over our head.

Sure he did some stupid stuff in his life, but I also know that he has his regrets. I remember one time in high school, we were talking about him and his trucking. He turned to me and said "Matt, don't ever go into driving if you want to have a family." He regrets the missed birthdays, vacations, holidays, games, and the normal time that most dads spend with their sons. I've been on the road with Dad and have seen him in that driver's seat for 10-12-14 hours a day, through all sorts of nasty conditions and traffic.

I think as Dad is getting older, he's starting to look at some priorities. He parked his truck and took a job as a company driver. Not so much for the money (but it helps), but for the fact he can now be home on a somewhat regular basis. He's looking at a place of his own to live instead of living out of his truck or at a hotel. And he's making a point to spend time with his granddaughter. To be honest, I don't know who was more tickled when Zoey was born, Mike or my dad!

So on this, the first day of his 61st year of life, I offer this humble but heartfelt wish...

Happy Birthday, Dad!

Goodbye, Freak

Well, the subject of my first "Frustration Chronicles" told me she hopes I drop dead of a heart attack. Isn't that lovely.

To be honest, I'm glad I pushed it with her. She was a chicken and a coward and frankly, a waste of my time. And she nearly cost me the true thing that's near and dear to me... my friends and family.

Thanks, J****, for helping me realize that I was just another notch on your bedpost. Thanks for letting me know there are people out there who actually love and support me and that you will never be one of them.

Thanks for taking such a big burden off my mind. You're a worthless piece of garbage. You said I would have been better off sticking a knife in your heart; is that invitation still open?

Dear readers, I was only joking on that last part. Frankly, I could care less if she lives or dies. I'm just glad I didn't get AIDS from her!

On Clinton...

Although I don’t have a horse in the race that is the South Dakota Democratic Primary*, I feel I should put in my 2-cents on the comments made by Hillary Clinton when she spoke to the Argus Leader editorial board yesterday.

Frankly, the comments Bobby Kennedy being assassinated are disturbing to say the least. And although people like Todd Epp might consider a “Clinton Conspiracy” ala Vince Foster, I doubt “Hill-dog” is planning anything that nefarious.

For being a 2-term senator and being involved in politics longer than yours truly has even been alive, you’d think Clinton would be able to choose her words more carefully. In this world of instant sound bites and news that was outdated 5-seconds ago, a political creature** like Clinton knows that his or her words are going to get aired, sliced-and-diced, and commented on before they even leave her mouth.

But knowing what she has said and knowing how political spin doctors keeps one from putting their foot too far in their mouth, you have to wonder if there isn’t something more nefarious than a simple slip of the mental gears. To a lot of people, Clinton is nothing more than a political opportunist, myself included. She’s a strong person, but she’s also a demogauge. I like to joke that she won’t even take a dump without taking a poll on what kind of toilet paper to use! She’s a fairly clever political mind and knows what to say and who to say it too.

But you wonder now that she’s the “second banana” in terms of polling numbers (even with Florida and Michigan Delegates), her true colors aren’t starting to show. I guess I’d be a mite pissed if I thought the Democratic nomination was going to be a matter of time and all of sudden this upstart steals all my thunder and glory. She may be a political creature***, but she is still human, no matter what Rush Limbaugh might think!

And some pundits on CNN last night even went so far to wonder if these comments won’t hurt her senatorial career, especially if she decides to run for re-election again. If that’s the case, it wouldn’t be the first time a Clinton faced political trouble for failing to control their impulses!****

*Or is that “Jackass” in the race? Anyway, I’m a registered independent, honest!
**Not saying Hillary isn’t human, but rather touching on the quote by Socrates that “(hu)man is a by nature, a political animal.” And if you think otherwise, you’re an idiot and need to read the classics!
***Refer to above comment. I can’t believe that I have to have these stupid disclaimers!
****Both Clintons seem to have problems with closure… Hillary can’t seem to close her mouth, Bill couldn’t seem to close his zipper!

Frustration Chronicles #1: J****

Sorry that I've been incommunicado, faithful readers (all three of you!), but it's been a pretty hectic, frustrating kind of a month. Sometimes it feels like the whole world is collapsing in on itself and you're left with one of those dinky circus umbrellas to shield yourself against the falling rocks.

So, instead of keeping it in and letting it fester, I've decided to let it out in the open, a catharsis, if you will. I call it the "Frustration Chronicles." And believe me, I have more than enough material!

The most pressing source of my frustration right now has to deal with J****. In case you're wondering, "What's a J****", let me assure you that a J**** is not a "what" but a "who". To be more specific, the woman I love and who is again my greatest source of frustration at this time.

I met J**** about three years ago. We had a couple of dates, but she had this nasty little habit of either breaking things off when things got interesting or simply just disappeared with no logical rhyme or reason. Eventually, she came back, and we really started to enjoy each other's company, so much so we decided to start dating. She was (and still is) the only woman I have ever felt this strongly about.

Well I found out some things. Not going to go into specifics, but they pretty much devastated me... bawling for three days straight kind of devastated. And I broke things off and had no contact with J**** for a long time.

Fast-forward a year and a half. I had just about gotten over her, pretty much getting on with my life. All of a sudden, on this blog no less, she came back into my life. We agreed to meet for dinner, both of us scared as hell. She explained what had happened and I, for some dumb-assed reason, forgave her. Granted, I was still a bit miffed at her for what she did, but more so that she said she loved me, wanted to marry me, but when the fit had hit the shan a year and a half earlier, she bolted and didn't stand up to fight for me. But I figured if I was to move on with my life, I had to take a first step.

And then, despite all logic, something pretty amazing happened. We both found out we still had feelings for each other. We became friends, we started spending time together again, and while I was still a little leery of getting hurt again, I was ready to resume things before all this big hullabaloo. And then she dumped me for a piece of man-candy.

Well, from having my heart shattered a year and a half before, to being ready to take the plunge again (despite common sense), it was more than I could take. And I was MAD. Not upset, not agitated, not frustrated, but MAD. And I said some pretty horrible things, some that even appeared briefly on this blog before my rational self got a hold of me. And then I did it, I lit off the atomic bomb of the mouth. I said the one thing that devastated her. And as soon as I sent it, I immediately regretted it.

She said it would have been easier to stab her in the heart.

Now it's been almost 3 months. She still hasn't forgiven me for what was essentially something said in the heat of the moment. She said she still has feelings for me, just not the ones that would bring us back together. Frankly, she said friendship is still there.

Well after our trip to Chicago (in which she did a pretty good job of avoiding me unless she absolutely had to) she hasn't called, written, or nothing. In fact, I'm the one that's been trying to keep in contact, after all she said she wants to "be friends".

After much frustration, I finally asked her if she was trying to forget about me... she said "yes." From wanting to be friends to now wanting to forget me; I must have missed a memo somewhere.

So I called her a coward. The only difference between her hurting me and me hurting her is I immediately tried to make amends and not run and hide like she did. Now she's talking about moving away, after telling me that she was glad I didn't take a job in Wyoming (check last year's archives).

I wish this little girl would make up her mind once and for all. Does she want me or doesn't she? When I talk to her, she talks as though the possibility is still there. I've told her on many occasions that I'd be willing to give up everything I've known in my life... my family, my friends, my career, just to be with her for the rest of our lives. If not, then at least tell me so I can forget about you too and get on with my life!

I know she's afraid of being hurt again, but hey, I was afraid of being hurt too when I decided to let her into my heart again. I told her last Friday that she's ripped my heart out so many times, I'm not sure if I ever had one there to begin with! But I'm willing to take that chance, even if things go to pot and we never speak again. At least we would have honestly tried and not hidden behind some chickenshit excuses.

So that's my big frustration right now. And I know that she'll read this (she's one of the three) and probably pass this off as my pathetic ramblings. And more than likely it'll probably alienate her even more. But at the same time, I don't care. I'm fed up with all the frustration that's in my life.

So congratulations, J****, you just made my first posting in the "Frustration Chronicles."

A New Venture

So I thought about this over the weekend, and I decided that my life isn't busy enough. I've started a new blog that deals with broadcasting issues. I'm calling it "vox vocis desumo", which is Latin for "the voice electric."

Anyway, feel free to check it out. If you have any questions or opinions or would like to help me in this project, let me know!