Don't Quit

When I do my workouts, I usually see this poem near the fitness desk at the Madison Community Center. It provides me a lot of inspiration... not only during my workout, but when things seem a little overwhelming in my life.

I thought I'd share it with you. Enjoy!

Don't Quit

When things go wrong as they sometimes will,
When the road your trudging seems all uphill,
When the funds are low and the debts are High ,
And you want to smile but you have to sigh,
When care is pressing you down a bit,
Rest if you must, but don't you quit.

Life is queer with it's twists an turns,
As everyone of us must sometimes learn,
And many a failure turns about,
When he might have won had he stuck it out,
Don't give up though the pace seems slow,
You may succeed with another blow.

Success is failure turned inside out,
The silver tint of the clouds of doubt,
And you can never tell how close you are,
It may be near when it seems so far,
So stick to the fight when you're hardest hit,
It's when things seem worst that you cannot quit.

--Unknown Author

Two women...

Two women I know celebrated birthdays today.

The first woman has been incredibly supportive of me in my life... I guess you could say she's been like a mother to me! ;) She's always been there for me, in both the good times and in the not-so-hot times. And on top of that, she's a great person to talk to.

The other "woman" was like a train-wreck in my life. Deceptive, manipulative, condescending, you name it. This "thing" jerked me around so many times emotionally that I now have a shell built up around my heart that may take a very long time to break down. I felt as though I was never good enough, smart enough, and she never did anything to counter those feelings. And then there's the whole wish of me to die in a fire thing.

So guess who I'm wishing happy birthday to today? And guess which one can burn in Hell?

Resolutions

Since this is my first post of 2009 (and the first time I've gotten to a computer since my big move one floor down from my old place), I thought I'd start with some resolutions for the New Year.

1) To continue my healthy lifestyle and to work off the cookies, candy, and turkey I consumed over the holidays.

2) I will run a 5K race this year... I don't care about winning, I just want to NOT DIE!

3) I'll continue to save money in the hopes of having close to 10-thousand dollars in the bank... just a nice round number, what the heck.

4) To be more flexible in my life but also not get pushed around.

5) Laugh a little more.

6) Hear the words "Jessica" and "Nicci" without turning nauseous and throwing up.

7) Realize that not all women are heartless, soul-less she-things that either sleep around, set you up, and break your heart... or steal half your DVDs.

8) Help those that need it, criticize those that deserve it, make fun of those who are too full of themselves.

9) Stay up til 6 am a little more often, in bed no later than 1 am the rest of the time.

10) Enjoy life a little more and realize that it does not revolve around the radio station all the time.

Here's to a great 2009! May it be a helluva lot better than the old year!

"Some things just aren't meant to be."

"Some things just aren't meant to be."

Sounds like a cliche, but it's fairly solid advice my mom gave me yesterday. Those words keep echoing in my mind as I wrap my mind around the fact that I am once again single.

It was made painfully official Wednesday night. "Ex-Siggy" says she has too much on her plate right now with a new job, family issues, and school. I tried to make the argument that it wasn't the best idea to push away the people that cared about her during this stressful time, but she had her mind made up.

"Some things just aren't meant to be."

As disappointed as I am in our relationship coming to an end, I also find myself not being "broken up" about it. Perhaps because I knew she was keeping me at arm's length. Perhaps because I've been hardened and calloused because of the Ex-"Thing" and what she put me through. Perhaps it all goes back to what my mom said...

"Some things just aren't meant to be."

In any case, I did some soul-searching. And with the exception of some deep-seeded trust issues (which seem to have served me in this case) and a really STUPID argument, I didn't do anything wrong.

But what bothers me is some friend of mine have been telling me that she's denying ever having dated me. If that's the case then perhaps it is for the best that we part ways.

In any case, I'm not going to dwell on it. As Dad told me last night, "There are other fish in the sea." And I'll go back to what Mom said.

"Some things just aren't meant to be."

So I guess I'm back on the market. A little older, a little sadder, and perhaps a little wiser.

To forgive or not to forgive....

So... I'm spending the afternoon wondering about some things I've done and said in my past. Some good, some not so good.

I've often wondered whether or not to forgive someone that was a very close person in my life, especially after some pretty big hurting that she did. But of course, looking at her blog, she has taken my privileged communication with her and has now reverted to calling me a "retard." Very mature, Nicci. Bravo!

I'm sorry, pal, but I'm not the one who intentionally deceived a person they were supposedly in love with. I'm not the one who purposefully humiliated this person and his family on a very special occasion. Granted, I did some not-so-lovely things in my life and it bothers the hell out of me what I said and did... but you have no shame, no scruples and no soul.

And the fact you have your henchmen dragging our dirty laundry out into public is really mature too. But I guess I should expect nothing less coming from you.

So I apologize for what I said. You want to tell me to eff off, fine. But at least be man enough to do it face to face.

As for forgiving you... well, the jury's still out on that.

Fact is, for the first time in my life, I'm quite content with where things are going. Work is going well... I have great friends... Swee' Pea is growing like a weed (and about as talkative as her uncle!)... Oh, and my girlfriend and I are doing great, too! This is one thing that's been bothering me. I feel bad about what I said, and I guess I was looking for some kind of closure.

That's what I get for being so naive...and for being a knave!

I should just let her get her digs in, big deal. I've dealt with worse in my life and it's not like she's a major part of mine now. To be honest, I have no feeling for her at all. I don't care about her anymore; I just wanted to close the book once and for all. As for her fiancee, who is actually a pretty nice guy... I sure as heck hope you know what you're getting yourself into, my friend.

Of course, I'm still bringing it up, so I must still have some issue. But maybe some day when you're all good little boys and girls, Uncle Jackrabit will tell you all the story.

But until then, I'll have the good sense (for once) to keep my big yap shut... Some people could take a lesson or two on that! LOL

I'M NOT SICK!

One of the salespeople at the station told me that some of the older residents of Madison have been asking if I was sick. I guess they saw my weight loss and my lack of hair and made assumptions.

I'm here to assure all of you that no, I'm not sick. I don't have cancer. I am very much healthy and feeling better than I have ever felt in my adult life.

As for the bald head... I like it.. I look 10 years younger so I'm gonna keep the look for a while. Actually, I look better now than I did when I WAS 23!

So please, spread the word...

I'M NOT SICK!!!

One helluva Obit!

When I die, I hope I have the same sense of humor as this guy!

DOUGLAS -- A celebration of life for James William "Jim" Adams, 53, will be held at a later date.

He died Tuesday, Sept. 9, 2008 at Memorial Hospital of Converse County in Douglas.

Jim, who had tired of reading obituaries noting other's courageous battles with this or that disease, wanted it known that he lost his battle. It was primarily as a result of being stubborn and not following doctor's orders or maybe for just living life a little too hard for better than five decades.

He was born June 8, 1955 in Garrison, N.D. the son of James William and Ruby Helen (Clark) Adams.

He was sadly deprived of his final wish, which was to be run over by a beer truck on the way to the liquor store to buy booze for a date. True to his personal style, he spent his final hours joking with medical personnel, cussing and begging for narcotics and bargaining with God to look over his loving dog, Biscuit, and his family.

He would like to thank all "his ladies" for putting up with him the last 30 years.

During his life, he excelled at anything he put his mind to. He loved to hear and tell jokes and spin tales of grand adventures he may or may not have had.

He is survived by five sons, Jeremiah Adams and his wife, Nicole, Mica Olivas, Wade Olivas, Brice Simpson and Cole Adams; sister, Jerri Giegerich; two ex-wives, Vickie Harrison and Marilyn Williams; four grandchildren; two nieces; and two great-nieces.

He was preceded in death by his parents and a brother-in-law.

In lieu of flowers, he asks that you make a sizeable purchase at your favorite watering hole, get rip roaring drunk and tell the stories he no longer can.

Casper Star-Tribune Online, September 15, 2008

Rest in Peace, Jim. And thanks for one final laugh.

P.S. And who says death isn't funny!